When my hiatus gets longer and more frequent, it indicates the ending of my blog. So far, since I've started blogging in sec 1, none of my blogs lasted more than a year and this won't be an exception. So here's my final ramblings before I pull the plug. No sophistry, just random stuff. I'm sick, both body and mind.

Looking back, most of my expectations for 2008 back when I was in sec 4 were met, but many in the wrong way. Events today cleared my doubts about stuff and that, in a way, isn't something I was hoping for. I don't feel a connection anymore. "To whom?" some may wonder and start gossiping about it. No one in particular, but everyone in general.

Since kindergarten, I've placed family and friends as the greatest contributors to happiness in my life, and I still believe in it, just in a difference situation.

If there is something I hate, whether it's in myself or in others, it's indecisiveness if there's such a term. Some things should be left unsaid, so I'll keep my mouth shut.

Work taught me that having a pleasant facial expression can change people's impression of you. In a way, it's true. But I'm tired of smiling when I'm not happy. 42 muscles to frown, 2 muscles to smile, but none to keep your face poker. Since primary school, people told me that I look fierce in my usual face. I'm a lazy guy, and I have weak facial muscles. I don't like changing my expression when it isn't natural, and I don't like moving my mouth. I'm tired of being aware of how my actions may change people's impression of me.

Well, enough random stuff. Final words: fuck 2008, and 2009 ain't gonna be much better.

Strange how a small little thing can liven up my mood almost immediately. After nearing 5 years in HCI, I've finally found someone who stays near my house >.> Okay, that sounded lame xD

Today's Festival of Sports made me regret not forcing everyone in class to participate =X That way I could have gotten to play basketball xD Watched all the way to the end, quite inspired after seeing how some people play. Made me feel why there is such a big gap in skills despite similarity in age =\ Oh yeah Staff vs "All-Stars" match was damn cool, and our principal has grown too old =( In his prime - NTU basketball team. Now - sigh... =X I have a feeling our school hires teachers based on athletic credentials, including non-PE teachers xD

For me, I don't find just practising shots alone boring, much less a chore. I guess that what it means for me to like basketball. And after today, the desire to improve just becomes greater. Nevertheless, I find myself in quandary.

"A good player makes himself efficient. An excellent player makes his teammates efficient."

Best flier I've ever seen.

Look to your left and you might see something new. Next up, changing blogskin. I've always made my own blogskin, but dunno lah. Too lazy already =X

Need to lay off from basketball for a while, until my sunburn

Shall not speak of exams =] Eh but I've just mentioned it but I only said it to justify my stand that I will not talk about it... never mind >.> My whole body's red from playing basketball during the hottest time of the day =\ Well, I didn't want to get my uniform wet and didn't bring PE. Well at least my upper body got a tan now =] Mr Pang saw me playing when he was in the car and made the reading book gesture... Wonder what he wanted to say =P Seems like he did the same thing to Zhi Hong yesterday (guess who came after history exam) But in the end I still left later =\

稻香 is nice. Okay, that's probably an understatement. And Louis, don't taint my tagboard with your unpopular comments on this topic XP The lyrics remind me of Black Eyed Peas - Where Is The Love? The music and tune is so simple but that's the whole point of this song right? Cherish the simple things in life, you don't have to make it complicated to make it good.

Can't stop listening to Joe Hisaishi's works. Love his works, especially those which uses piano as the main instrument. Never fail to make my heart tremble. Hate youtube, since it's "Recommended Videos" mean that I cannot stop watching and listening >.<

Kinda crappish now =\ Shall go and mug ( you believe?) =]

and sY - don't give me the evil eye. I know my mistake liao, shall not intrude your private space in the library anymore xD

The actions of some people irk me so much that I almost lost my head. For a moment, my mind just froze up and I really felt like punching the hell outta him. Well, I guess the good thing is 1) I kept my cool 2) I didn't do something I might have regret later on.

I believe that all humans requires attention from others, whether from the opposite sex, or his/her own peers. Somehow, our actions instinctively try to achieve that goal without us even realizing it. However, there should be some boundaries in which our actions should not step over, such as when it starts irritate the people around you. Nevertheless, if we are not aware of our actions, how do we know when we cross the line? Perhaps we do see the signs, such as a sharp reprimand, but we choose to ignore them as it could just be them playing along. So what should be done then? I find a few ways quite appealing 1) Tell them to f* off, 2) Give them a slap on the face, 3) Tell them nicely that they are irritating the hell outta you. I find the first 2 choices more alluring, but it's probably just me trying vent that irritation >.> To each his own, everyone has their own methods.

I'm not saying that I'm all saint and everybody just loves me. As mentioned above, I can be unaware of my actions, so feel free to use any of the 3 methods to wake me up ^^

By the way, if you think that I'm talking about you, you're most likely not the one I'm talking about xD

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Anyway Saturday was weird. We had fun playing basketball, thrashing a group of people there twice ( we ain't pro) and losing to another group of CJC students 7-6. And the neighbourhood is damn cool, cos right beside the new basketball court is a beach volleyball court. Lots of teams queueing up, and no more going to Sentosa to play anymore ^^

Why did I say it was weird then? It's suppose to be an occasion to celebrate my Grandmother's birthday, so everyone gathered at my uncle's house for a reunion dinner. Meanwhile, my grandmother was left in her room while we were chattering happily. The tradition used to be going to a restaurant at Clark Quaye but it was deemed too troublesome since my grandmother's the type to make trouble. It was a rational decision, since my grandmother can barely remember anyone now, not even my uncles or father. Nevertheless, will I want to be treated the same way when I grow old (assuming I can get married first)? I don't know how to explain it further, so feel free to think about it yourself =\

No photos, since I didn't bother to take any >.<

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Decided not to go on about all the "Oh this world needs a screwdriver" thoughts I have been harbouring lately (about half a day ago). Too late and I'm feeling tired. I'll forget all about this the moment I wake up tomorrow anyway =]

Oh yeah, my handphone's spoilt -.- Don't ask me why, cos it just suicided without me coercing it to do so. What does this mean? I'll be uncontactable on the phone which isn't much since I've been breaking new records these few months for my SMSes and calls.

Felt what Mr Pang made us do is really meaningful. Sometimes, we say things only when it is too late. Many times do we lack the courage to say what we really want to say, since there's always tomorrow. In the end, tomorrow never comes. Taken from Tuesday With Morrie, isn't it a waste if we only say good things about the person during his/her funeral? Where would those words go? Why not tell the person while we still can? Of course, I doubt anyone is crazy enough to hold a live funeral >.>

By the way, to some people who didn't receive a note from me, it's either
1) It got misplaced. Sun Shuo became Shu Yang twice -.-
2) I really don't know what to say at that time, not that you don't have anything nice to say =X
3) I don't give a damn about you

Lol jk. No one fits the 3rd category =X More update tomorrow/ Sunday. Grandmother's birthday celebration tomorrow, but playing basketball before that with my cousins. Gonna be my 6th day in a row >.<

"If Tomorrow Never Comes"
by Ronan Keating

Sometimes late at night
I lie awake and watch her sleeping
She's lost in peaceful dreams
So I turn out the lights and lay there in the dark
And the thought crosses my mind
If I never wake up in the morning
Would she ever doubt the way I feel
About her in my heart

If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her
Did I try in every way to show her every day
That she's my only one
And if my time on earth were through
And she must face the world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes

'Cause I've lost loved ones in my life
Who never knew how much I loved them
Now I live with the regret
That my true feelings for them never were revealed
So I made a promise to myself
To say each day how much she means to me
And avoid that circumstance
Where there's no second chance to tell her how I feel

If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her
Did I try in every way to show her every day
That she's my only one
And if my time on earth were through
And she must face the world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes

So tell that someone that you love
Just what you're thinking of
If tomorrow never comes

It's 9/11 today, in case you didn't notice. So, what's the purpose of terrorism? To make a mark in history? I seriously doubt so. Nevertheless, that is the only thing they have achieved so far, on the macro side. So what other purposes might they have? Harming the lives of innocents? Congratulations, they definitely achieved that target, even though I do not see the point of doing so.

Perhaps they wish to diminish the power Western countries have, but can terrorism really achieve that? What they do is merely a mosquito bite to these countries, irritating but not doing much damage. By the way, I do not mean that the lives of innocents are only worth a mosquito bite, but that their actions will not change the way country functions besides stocking up and upgrading their pesticides. The only way they can do so is to conquer a country, and make it their utopia, since they feel unsatisfied with their current surroundings. I wonder if saying this will get me arrested >.> Maybe next time the terrorists will say " Give us a land for us to live freely in and we'll stop pestering you", then I can claim ownership of that land since the original idea came from me =X

Nothing else to crap, so I'll just end here. Hopefully I'll still be alive the next time you see me ^^

The feeling of liking someone is you enjoy being in the company of that person. Being jealous is a sign that you like that person, but this feeling stems from you wanting her attention on you always. Being "overjealous" is a sign of irrationality.

Becoming a couple is like a promise "I'll always be there for you". But nevertheless, you don't own the person, hence there is a need of being more understanding and give her more space. Just liking someone is a "no strings attached", so you should never feel that she owes you her attention.

Doesn't feel two weeks since I've last posted >< Time flies, or another interpretation can be that my life has been too mundane to blog about =(

I can proudly say that the holidays hasn't been fruitless =D Finally got myself to study yesterday but crap, holidays is ending in 3 days =\

I remember Mr Quek's talk about the Teachers' Day speech on the little things that count... Wait a minute, he told us that last Wednesday and I'm only blogging about it a week later? =X Anyway I found it pretty meaningful, because it's probably the main reason why I stopped so many of my hobbies. When you can't find the spark that maintains your interest, then it'll just dwindle away and you just can't be bothered to continue anymore. This applies to a lot of stuff, be it playing the piano, guitar, rollerblading and all sorts of activities.

On another note, I haven't stopped rollerblading. I've just... put it on hiatus for now >.> I still enjoy rollerblading - when you finally master the trick after weeks of practice, you just can't wait to learn another one ^^ Anyway, I figured if you can just find that small little bit of joy and concentrate on it, then you can probably persevere on. I'm still trying to find it for playing the guitar =\

Of course, there's still things you love doing even though you don't know the reason. Basketball has been unfair to me, being "blessed" with "vertical challenges" >.> I don't actually find a lot of joy while playing since I get all serious *most of the time* so I can't exactly explain why I like it. But I guess such a thing exists for everyone right? Doing something even without knowing why you do it.

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Supposed to be helping my father this morning but I guess he can't be bothered to wake me up =\

Blogging right now to stop myself from playing games =X I was damn enthu to work on my schoolwork on the bus, but I've barely stopped myself when I switched on the computer >.<

Yesterday's table-tennis match was kinda boring, especially when we got totally owned =\ A lot of people said that our table tennis sucks ( after watching the match), but how poor can a team be if they have won a Olympics Silver, and we have World Seed no. 6 & 7 in our team? Let's get the facts right - the Singapore team isn't lousy, China is just too good. If we consider Hong Kong as part of China, then the top 10 seeds are all China natives, with the top 5 representing China.

On another note, I like how journalists make use of words to make people think differently, like saying Singapore couldn't overtake the "Juggernaut" China. Meanwhile, the article next to it says China's Lin Dan "outclasses" Msia's Lim Chong Wei. If only my command of English is that good, then my GP grade will probably be much higher =\ Of course, Lin Dan owned Lim Chong Wei, but it's much more enjoyable to watch him perform when the opponent isn't us xD

Okie, time to take a nap before working on PW and other stuff. Blah, there's so much stuff I wanna do after promos - Guitar, piano, basketball, rollerblade and hell lot of other sports. 6 more weeks, gotta endure >.< Of course, my idea of endurance is probably different from yours =P

Currently locked outside my room due to some... unfortunate circumstances. Thus, I shall BLOG! o.O

Can't believe how long it has been since I've last updated, discounting the last post. Let's just be truthful - I'm just too lazy =P

"Please make good use of the long weekend to do your revision. Jia you!" - guess who sent me this? Anyway, to at least accomplish part of that wish somehow, I decided to go bring my physics and maths stuff to the library and do whatever I can. Hence, by the time I was chased out of the library, I managed to complete...

reading Dragons of Lost Star -.- Okay, that's a lie - I finished it after reaching home =\ Quite a relief for me to finish it since I could only read a few pages a day ever since school started and 2) The book isn't mine =\ What's more, there's still the third book!!! And yeah, it's in my possession since June Hols >.<

Quite a lot of stuff happened during the last few weeks, none of which I can remember =X I feel sad not going rollerblading this week even though I could, since I haven't had the time in the past few weeks. Well, if I had disciplined myself not to slack so much, I'm likely to have more time in my hands.

But that's pretty much the problem - Kinda unmotivated to do any work lately ( lately in the sense of past few weeks, not days) Despite Meiling completing the board game, despite me getting less work to do than before, despite my mentor constantly pestering me for updates, I couldn't do anything. And the "despite"s include enlightenment on how to do Econs essay, as well as greater understanding of Thermodynamics, or whatever crap revision lectures or remedials I've been through, I. Just. Can't. Do. Anything.

Someone, please wake me up. Kick me in the butt. Pour water over me. Throw me into the sea. Just do something to wake me up. Then a wise man will come up and say "nobody can force you to do anything, you have to do it yourself" and I'll say "Go to Hell".

Not exactly the type of post I wanted to break the hiatus with. There's lots of stuff I wanted to say but well, I ended up... can't say "let of some steam". Someone might think I'm suffering from pressure, but no - I'm just angry with myself because I can't feel the pressure around me, the kind that pushes myself to work hard.

Oh yeah, final note, I can't believe I forgot about the deadline for application of OB Korea >.> And... I'm still stuck outside my room.

Haven't blogged lately. I surprise myself by saying that I have been too busy to blog (well at least for these few days) Shall update really soon ^^ Now, I'm gonna get my 4 hours of sleep >.<

Back from my renewed obsession - rollerblading =]

Well, I was back some time ago, but anyway met some really cool guys today who gave really helpful tips. Some new stuff I learnt - if you wanna continue practicing throughout the day, wear guards. Secondly, wear long pants - attempting tricks gives your legs free waxing =X Everyone is free to join me on Sat and Sundays =]

Anyway, some highlights - Inspire concert was frigging imba. Especially Stella Story - a rock band. The vocalist has an imba voice, the lead guitarist blazed through his soloes and the drummer who was well... you can't count fast enough to keep up with his beats =\ Unfortunately, it's hard for a seated audience to go crazy, so they really didn't deserve this sort of crowd =( Other favourites were the MAD bboys( a few screw ups tho =X) and funk faction crew =]

And lastly, muay thai was fun =)

It has been 1 month + 2 days since I've last blogged. Wanted to make it exactly 1 month but today is more special. It's KT Tunstall's birthday, Zidane's birthday, Woon Pin's birthday and Jason Mraz's birthday. Well, happy birthday to my brother( only one of them is, even though I don't mind having all of them as my siblings ^^)

I wanna blog more, but coincidentally, today is also the start of Blocks, so goodnight.

Arts Fest yesterday was pretty good. Best performance goes to choir even though not the whole choir was present xD I'd rather they sing Lullaby instead though =P Guitar was pretty bad though, with only the J1s performing >.> No comments for the others =X Unfortunately, the whole performance was plagued by poor concert behaviour, so you cannot really 'enjoy' the performances =\

Rollerblading for GEMS just rekindled my interest for the sport =]

死神的秘密 is definitely worth the ticket's price ^^ Very touching near the ending and quite a meaningful movie. About a Shinigami who was sent to judge 3 people - A 28 years old lady, a Yakuza( Japanese mafia) and a 70 year old hairdresser, as to whether they have fulfilled their purpose in life and be allowed to die. I guess what the producer wanted to convey is that no matter how dark your life may be right now, continue living and you just might be able to see that sunny blue sky.

I wonder what it means to toe the line, living your life to the fullest. Does it mean enjoying life as if there's no tomorrow? Then, what will you do if today is the last day of your life? As for me, I don't know =\

Bleah 4 days of rest and I didn't get any work done >.> Shall do my best to smoke through this week =X

"Throwing away the people important to you, saying that you don't want to fight."

Just finished watching the whole Honey & Clover series, including season II. The pent up emotions makes me wanna play the piano, but *looks at the time* I guess not.

Are you willing to forsake everything for love? In this time and day, where rationalism is the core of today's society, many will answer no. Who knows how long this love can last? And what are you going to do, when it ends, and you find yourself broken in bits and pieces? Nevertheless, people still chase after it, seeking for that happiness, while maintaining their decision not to give their all.

"When the stem of a plant breaks, you need to cut it off for new shoots to grow. But somehow, it's hard to do so, seeing the leaves of the broken stem still so green and healthy."

I'm gonna get my 2nd scar on my left arm soon >.> Well at least this time there's no need to go see the doc(or at least we think so) and just let it heal. The chalet was... I dunno what to say =\ Eh first time I had a bbq without having to go the toilet =P Mr Wu is damn pro xD

Yesterday was the 100th day of my uncle's death. Fell asleep standing while reciting the scriptures >.> Can't help it, 3 hours of sleep on the floor really isn't enough =\ There was a memorial for him in the afternoon by Singapore Art Museum. The speeches were boring, but I almost teared when people were speaking of their experiences with him. Well, I tear easily these days, but it was really touching. Shake! at night was quite good, but I think last year's Mosaic was better, probably because it was the year end concert =\

Today was quite simple - sleep, eat, watch H&C, surf the internet. Exciting, is it not?

"Get too close to the Sun and you'll only burn yourself." - Fullmetal Alchemist

There's many interpretations to this quote, but I guess most of them are quite true. For example, there are some things that just shouldn't be known, since it will bring nothing but harm. That's why there are such things known as secrets.

Sometimes when you think you're reflecting on past events, some important stuff just seem to slip off your mind. If one has remembered those stuff, will he still make the same decision? Of course, as 旁观者，we may say yes. But have we factored in the psychological distress that person was facing at that time? Under those conditions, can one still make a rationale decision?

"Can't seem to make myself nervous about tomorrow's Physics test. Without this sense of anxiety, it's quite hard to concentrate on studying =\"

Actually the above is written when I just started writing this post ^^ Feel more.... serious now but..... I wanna watch Honey and Clover again after listening to its OST >.< Blah =\

Haven't listened to Stephen Lynch for years liao >.> Brings back memories siah xD

But anyway, I FINALLY started working on my H3 project, 11 days after meeting the mentor >.> Really need to be more proactive into this, since no one will be pestering me to work on it =\ Talking about projects, my group's GPP is now GGP - GG Proposal >.>

My left speaker isn't working, or to be more precise, it's the system which isn't working. Feels weird listening from one side only =(